{On my Heart} Mondays. [Loving all the days of your life]

To love a spouse amid the flame of honeymoon passion is human,

but to love a spouse all the days of your life,

even before you ever lay eyes upon that person -

this kind of love is divine.

― Eric & Leslie Ludy, A Perfect Wedding ―

Love begins way before your wedding day, even before you ever meet 'The One' the Lord has for you. 

Love, the way the world throws at us, sounds alluring but is so different to real Love.

Dating whomever you want - no committment so no hurt involved right? 
If you really 'love' someone, you will sleep with them. 

See where the relationship goes, if you guys don't like it, well that's ok - it was just dating!
Sounds so carefree and full of pleasure.

But the root of a lot of the world's version of love is selfishness. 
How the other person completes us, how they make us feel, how they satisfy us 'in the moment'.

We stop wanting to be a part of the Love when we are not longer satisfied. 

Marriage thrives on a different kind of love, a divine kind.

We only have to look at scripture to understand it is nothing like what the world defines as love.

'Love is patient and kind. 
Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude.
 It does not demand its own way.
 It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 
It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.
 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, 
and endures through every circumstance.'
{1 Corinthians 13: 4-7}

'A Poetic love is a selfless love.
It's noble, it's pure, it's tender, it's dignified, it's grand....
it's heavenly.
We all have our moments of selfless nobilioty, but poetic love isn't a one-time heroic deed. 
Rather, it's a lifelong lifestyle of romantic service to our spouse.'
― Eric & Leslie Ludy, A Perfect Wedding ―

One of the most beautiful ways of keeping romance alive in marriage is thinking of the other person. Being mindful of their needs.

This can start before you are married.

If you are single, you are still able to be mindful of the one that the Lord has planned for you.

You can care for them by loving them all your days.

How can you possibly love them all your days? You mean before you even know them.

That's what I am proposing!

When you are not married and the Lord hasn't yet shown you the one He has for you, there is an incredibly opportunity to still love them in waiting.

You can write them love notes or even songs as well as not allowing access to the inner depths of your heart to any guy who shows interest.

It is not a bad thing for a guy to work for your heart.

A man who is truly seeking God will work for the priviledge of knowing your heart.

I started a book of notes when I went to college, I will have to explain our story fully sometime to explain the beauty behind what the Lord was doing in my life. (I know I keep saying this.)

I had surrendered a relationship to the Lord and was not dating.

I did not have anyone pursuing me as much as I wanted that to be happening.

I bought a book and started writing letters to my future husband.

I wrote in that book through to the night before my wedding day.

It was such a wonderful gift to give to A.

I won't share with you any of the content as it is reserved for his eyes only - but it was my gift to him of the inner depths of my heart.

I wrote dreams in there, letters & prayers...when he did appear on the scene and we did not want to discuss any 'heavy' topics initially those went in there too.

I was able to pour my heart out in those letters, freely.

I wanted him to see my love for him all those days even when I was not sure who he was.

Even if you feel you didn't start early enough, or you are already in a relationship.

Why not start anyway. 

I have several amazing friends who started this so much earlier than I did.

But it was still beautiful even though I only wrote in my book for a few short years.

'God never wastes a test of patience.'

 ― Eric Ludy ―

'Restlessness and impatience change nothing except our peace and joy. Peace does not dwell in outward things, but in the heart prepared to wait trustfully and quietly on Him who has all things safely in His hands.'
― Elisabeth Elliot ―

The point I am trying to make is the importance of selfless love.

Sacrifice before you are married, builds sacrifice in marriage.
Patience now helps you to be more of a grace-dispenser in marriage.

'Before you get married, learn to give everything - 
and learn to give as if giving were the greatest pleasure, 
because it is. 
Learn to stop figuring out what you should be getting out of the deal. 
Learn to give without a required payback. 
Learn to give simply because God has given so much to you.'
― Eric & Leslie Ludy, A Perfect Wedding ―

Learning to give selflessly for me, is also a way to be content.

There is nothing like focusing on someone else to help you see what truly matters.

That you and your problems are really not that big.

Even if you have made mistakes in the past, God is a redemptive God.

He is able to wash your slate clean, wash you literally white as snow.

He frees us from our past enabling us to start living for Him today.

Live to glorify Him with your love life.

Trust him to show you the prince He has for you.

Show the Lord that you trust Him by living devoted to that prince all the days of your life.

Much Love,

L