The ever-continuing Life Lesson.

I love this idea. I saw Kerrie write about it today and headed over to see what it was all about. The idea of writing every day for September. Not realistic at this point in life unfortunately but I love the idea of it. Since I had planned to share a little more personally today, I went ahead and went with today's prompt.

Blogtember Day 3. Pass on some useful advice or information you learned and always remembered. 

I don't know that I would necessarily call it advice, more like something I have learned am learning. I don't know that I can classify it as something I always remember, but its something I hope to always remember.

I saw myself learning it when I first got to college and experienced heartache (more on that soon I promise, but here's what came before). I found myself falling flat on my face before a choice right after I was married. Then last year it was on my heart a few times here and here. There was a choice to be made, to choose to dwell on things and allow myself to fixate on what had been taken away from me by the Lord, or the choice to trust that He knows what He is doing, even when I think I know better.   

To choose contentment with where He has me.

I really do believe it is a choice. We won't overnight become those pretty girls that always look so happy, whose lives seem to be perfect in all the ways we hope for. The ones we see living our very own dreams. We all too easily fall into the habit of comparison and longing (I know I can!).
But I am beginning to think that each of us makes this choice daily. No-one's life is perfect, as evidenced by pop culture today and those in our generation that may have everything the world tells us we need. Money doesn't buy happiness, popularity doesn't seem like all its made out to be and trends soon die out before most of us may even be on board with what is currently 'in.'

But we can choose to be thankful. To embrace what the Lord has blessed us with and given to us, even for a season. Even if we are in the midst of a rough season, thankful He has given us a season of clinging to Him.

So I think the only information I would pass along today friends, is that. Contentment is a choice, one I am always trying to work towards. I know I always need a little more practice.
But somewhere in between the practice of rejoicing with others, seeking God's heart for others and crying out to Him when needed....I hope to learn it fully.

Contentment. 

Passion in Brokenness.

Honestly, its been a hard season year over here. Lots of tears, battles fought, with some won and some taking every ounce of strength I have and then some. Thankfully through it all there has been a lot of refining, growth and holding onto the Lord with everything I have. So I can't really complain about the process. Anything which brings me closer to Him with a daily drive to be in His presence is worth all the pain. 

Being married has been a blessing in so many ways, yet in others I have found it extremely hard. I have this bad habit of caring deeply what other people think of me. Often allowing their opinions to define who I think I am and not the Lord. And its been a hard year for learning to let go of approval from others. From not being ashamed of where the Lord has taken me in life, how He has orchestrated certain things and how I met my husband young. 

I started sharing our love story here. Then I stopped, to be honest I almost completely dropped out of the blogging community all together not long after. Many things factored into this happening. But one of which was feeling the desire to hide. You see, I grew up with a deep heart for purity and waiting. For waiting on the Lord's timing for romance and wanting to encourage single young women to fall in love with Him and trust Him to work out the rest. I had a lot of friendships formed with that common ground. 

It was a beautiful season in my life. 

Then I got married.

 And I was ashamed to talk about this beautiful story the Lord had written in my life. I didn't want to make other girls feel bad about where the Lord had them. I wanted to still encourage them to keep waiting and trusting, now knowing that what He had whispered to my young heart about trusting Him was completely true! 

But I began to allow this to rob me of the joy He has given me with where I am now.

It has been a hard few years understanding why the Lord gave me a passion for Waiting and Purity, then bringing my husband to me at a young age. I can't begin to understand what it feels to be a late-20 something single girl who is struggling with loneliness and longing for an earthly prince. Yet my heart breaks, because my heart is minister to you, friend. To reach out and assure you that it will be ok. That the Lord does have beautiful plans for each one of us, we are just never sure what those plans are until we are the other side.

{Via}

I am still not sure how He will continue to use me with this passion. Whether it will change into a passion for something else completely or if He will continue to use me in small ways in this area. I have no idea what the Lord is doing to be honest. 

Something I would appreciate your prayer for, friends!

I had started writing here sharing thoughts on purity, waiting and loving the Lord. I still think these are totally relevant. I also feel at a crossroads of Him doing something bigger and moving forward, I just can't yet see what that is. So maybe there are big changes ahead for this little space as I pray, listen and hope to follow His leading.

In the meantime, I am resting in the assurance that God is good. 

He is gracious and loving. 

Understanding the longings of my heart even I can seem to understand 

(or explain). 

I am so thankful to sit in His presence when my poor husband is not sure how to help because I don't understand how this passion is still so present in my current life situation.

And my heavenly prince gets it. He understands what I'm feeling and probably smiles knowing what is on the other side of the crossroad. 

In the meantime I hope to continue encouraging you ladies, sweet friends. Even in all the rambling and brokenness from this girl. Thankyou for being gracious with me as I have not replied to emails or taken forever to do things. 

You show me Christ daily and I am so thankful. 

Much Love!

L

A Love Story. Maybe its Ours. Part 1.

I don't know about you guys, but I really feel like I should be having  more girly evenings. Just this desire to sit down with girly magazines, do eat others hair, watch a girly movie or even just hang out and talk. Perhaps its because I've done a bunch of hanging with the hubby and some of his friends lately. Or maybe just that I'm more of a girly girl than I thought I was haha. Or just that I'm in desperate need of a manicure ;)

I'm not sure if this should become a weekly thing too. A girly night here in this little space. Wouldn't it be awesome if the comments section became like a chatting place. Sorry dreaming moment there.

As you can probably tell I get these random dreaming moments or moments of inspiration as I like to call them. 

Anyway, just wondering if you guys had any suggestions on topics for girly evenings? Things you want to talk about together? And I say that cause I would love to talk with you guys and not at you guys too :) 

I felt the desire to share our love story for the first time this evening. And if you were here, I would probably pull out the scrapbooks ;)

Not sure how far I'll get but I will go ahead and start. I've been meaning to share for a while how God scripted our story and just haven't got to it. 

So if you're at a point in life where this won't be encouraging, feel free to stop reading here.

I don't want to discourage anyone, I just want to share how the Lord brought us together to praise His goodness in that and to encourage those of you who are waiting, that God does hear us when we pray and write beautiful love stories.

(I will add that obviously this is all from my point of view, 

for A's version....well I guess you'd have to ask him.....)

So here's possibly why I put this off haha! Because in my opinion, the story starts here.

In the awkward pre-teen new girl stage. I had just moved from another country where I had been really comfortable. I had been in a school I loved and had a group of friends who I was close to, then we moved. And not like one of your few hours away kind of moves, but more like a different part of the world, new continent type of move. So there was no possible chance I was going to see these friends on a regular basis, if ever again. Time took my group of friends to literally the four corners of the globe, so you get the idea haha. 

So I had just moved to this new place and the new church we started going to had an Awana club, including a Jr high group. So my sister and I started going and there we met some pretty cool people. Many of whom we would grow up with of the next few years.

One of which was this guy:

(Totally asked his permission before posting btw)

And yeah, well I will confess that even at thirteen. I liked him. He seemed like a nice guy, not that we were going to date or anything like that. But lets just say I totally had a crush on him back then. 

So if you skip several awkward years of being friends, me having a bit of a crush on him. But never knowing each other that well as he was homeschooled and I went to school, we only saw each other at Awana. Then we also went to youth group together, having several of the same friends. It wasn't as though there were many kids our age. 

So my last year of high school and the year after (I took a gap year after high school), we hung out with our friends and started to get to know each other well.

Mutually liking what we saw in the other person.

I had begun praying about what I wanted in a husband someday when I was sixteen. I also began reading several books like I kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris, When God Writes Your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy, but didn't really have any idea at this point what to do with dating. A's parents had thought a lot about those things beforehand and really advocated no dating in high school. And looking back I am so glad they shared their wisdom with us. 

(I would highly recommend those books, even if you don't agree with everything...they are worth reading and make you think! I would also advocate while in high school figuring out what your thoughts on about dating before you meet a guy you like!)     

I knew A when I wrote what I was looking for in a husband, but we weren't super close. In fact I had several other crushes in between meeting him and really liking him by the end of high school :)

So by the end of high school I pulled that list back out and his character was a lot like what I had been praying for, not 100% perfect though. 

After all we were still incredibly young and both planned on going to college.....in different countries. 

But by this point, we liked what we saw in each other and weren't sure what to do about it.

It was suggested to us, that because we were getting so close with no intention of being able to be engaged or marry anytime soon, that we stop talking on leaving for college in different countries. Instead just trusting that if the Lord wanted the two of us together, He would make that clear. So that we wouldn't continue to make something work that was never intended for where we were at in life. 

And I am SO glad we did. 

So summer before college, I said goodbye to my best friend, maybe for good.

Praying and trusting that God knew what He was doing, even if we didn't have a clue.

A few hours after the picture was taken, he got on a plane heading to the states to go to college.

I stayed home for the summer with multiple adventures (stories for another time) then headed to England in the fall for college.

But I might stop there for this evening friends! 

A Girly Night.

Hey Friends,
Lets grab a cup of coffee together this evening, or tea, or if like me you are still experiencing some winter evenings, how about some hot cocoa? Snuggle up in your PJs too if you like. I would encourage you to grab a blanket and curl up on our couches round the fireplace. I'm curled up by the fireplace this evening thinking of you girls sitting with me discussing our favorite movies, hanging out, sharing our hearts and having a fun evening together.

After hearing how each of your days were, I know we would move on to sharing deeper things, I am sure the topic of purity would come up at some point. And being married I'm sure so many of you wonder why I am still focused on it. But I still love talking about it, its something so close to my heart. Its totally something we think about while waiting for that special someone right? It's keeping ourselves pure before marriage, saving ourselves for that one guy. Anyway, you get that lots of times we associate purity with singleness. 

God has really been showing me since I got married that it is so much more than all that. He has been showing me more and more that it goes beyond the wedding day. 

Since this could be our first girl night together, I'm going to back up a little before going into a talk about purity after marriage as there are probably some background things about me you would want to know. I grew up in a christian family for starters, so I heard about God and His love for me at a young age. I also did a Purity program (True Love Waits) in high school and made the decision to save sex for marriage. My parents even gave me a ring engraved with the date I made the commitment showing their support of my decision. After completing high school the Lord really gave me a deeper heart for purity, only by His grace did I make it through high school having never been physical with a guy, because for the majority of it, I was still figuring out what I thought about purity and waiting. Now I will honestly tell you, I really believe that saving yourself for marriage is a wise decision, for obvious physical reasons and emotional reasons. I really believe that God shows us that the best plan for us is to wait until marriage to fulfill our physical desires.

But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.

1 Cor 7:2

The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.

1 Cor 6:13

We must not indulge in sexual immorality as some of them did, and twenty-three thousand fell in a single day.

1 Cor 10:8

Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality,  idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Galatians 5:19-20

For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor....

1 Thessalonians 4:2-4

Such verses really convict me on these thoughts. 

For years I also loved the Rebecca St. James song Wait for Me and had it as my ringtone for through college. The Lord really worked on my heart showing me that I needed to trust Him to bring the right guy into my life at the right time. It was hard. I am sure so many of you are in that stage right now, and friend I wish I could give you a huge hug as we sit round our fireplace talking. And encourage you, to keep pursuing God and His wonderful plans for you.  
Those years were some of the most difficult years of my life, but so so precious. I'm not just saying that, I've been there and I know its true. Intimacy with Jesus was such a part of that waiting period for me. Just moments of learning how to sit in His presence and enjoy being with Him. 
Waiting on His timing for romance, learning that relationship with Him is a beautiful romance.

I remember journaling at midnight the night before my birthday freshman year.
How precious it is now to look back and realise the intimacy that was forming in my heart for my king. Being able to celebrate my birthday with Him first was so special to me.

Despite all the unknowns and the wonderings of who the Lord had for me. The desires in my heart for a guy to someday pursue me and love me. I look back now on those years joyfully, and hope to encourage you dear friends in that way. Because I see how precious they were.

I see that God used them to show me that He wanted my whole heart. 
How by trusting Him, I learned to love Him even more. 
Because He was so faithful & trustworthy.

Those are the thoughts I would share with you this evening friend wherever they find you. Whether married with small children and so so tired, newly married and confused about where life is going or single and waiting. Purity is for each one of us. Purity begins with intimacy with our prince. 

Love you friends!

L

P.S. I really want to have another girly night soon. 

Through Green Tinted Glasses.

I sign into my Instagram account when I have a few moments in my say and see a gorgeous picture of a mommy cuddling her little one in a chair early in the morning. My heart swells with joy for this sweet friend. 

It wasn't always as easy to be happy for others for me, in fact if we go way back to Jr high we can perhaps pinpoint the beginning of my dilemma. Maybe it began even earlier. 

Walking the halls of my school doing a circuit of the Jr high hallway loop with some friends at lunchtime, yeah we thought we were so cool. We passed my current crush with a group of his friends. As we walked closer I saw he was holding hands with one of the girls with him. I was devastated. 

And immediately hated this girl. Oh the drama when you're 13 right?!?! haha. 

So anyway, time passed and I hopefully matured some. Grew up and then found myself in a relationship with my husband. We were together quite a while before getting engaged since we both lived in different countries. Then some similar feelings came flooding back when another friend of mine got engaged.

What?! But I was the one waiting patiently right? We had been praying for the Lord's leading in our relationship and trying to make wise decisions. I may not have hated this friend this time, but I totally envied her. It just didn't seem fair. 

Even once I was engaged, I then watched several friends get married in a few short months after becoming engaged. Of course, I had learned my lesson right? Wrong! 

They should WAIT THEIR TURN! I'M NEXT!!! 

Is exactly what came out of my ugly heart. 

I'm even ashamed to admit that in some of these situations, I wanted nothing to do with any of these girls once they had what I wanted. 

Big green monster anyone?

Finally once married, I watched several sweet friends getting married shortly after us. 

And know what came out of my ugly heart...but getting married was my moment. 

We are still enjoying our own wedding and honeymoon period. 

This was where I was stopped cold in my tracks.

This was ugly.

And NOT who I wanted to be.

This was not glorifying Jesus and loving others.

I wanted to be happy for my friends. To share in their joys as well as their sufferings. 

So how did I begin to battle this? Because it has been just that, a battle.

A dying to self process.

I decided shortly after that I needed to start my making my actions seem happy for the other person and trust that my heart would follow. I may not have gone around bursting with excitement for expectant mamas (although I embarrassingly do that now in a very genuine way. haha oops!) It began as a simple act, like finding out a friend was engaged & instead of saying nothing, I would send a short note to them saying congratulations! Saying how excited I was and asking how the planning was going. 

(I didn't want to be fake in my excitement, but just share their joy) 

I started practicing this everytime a friend was expecting. I would send a little gift to show I cared. Or a congratulations card. Or a quick phone call or even a short email.

I began to see a heart change in myself. Instead of making a conscious effort to do these things, it became natural.

Practicing celebrating with others then turned into a general thrill and excitement over blessings in my friends lives. 

Seeing a friend's belly swell with a little miracle and attending her baby shower, while I myself have not yet been blessed in that way. I no longer see things through green tinted glasses. I see precious little babies and am so thankful I get to share in the joy of those around me. 

Weddings now make my heart soar as I see a picture of the way Christ loves the church, instead of feeling sad that someone else is having a magical day or seeing it as better than my own wedding. 

Sometimes, it is still a challenge. 

But its also a choice.

It feels so vulnerable to share these thoughts with you guys, because they seem so ugly now I have said them out loud. Yet I share them because it is a battle I have walked through and still choose to allow Christ to help me through. Through these thoughts, I hope you see Jesus, grace and what He is capable of doing in our lives when we have a willing heart. 

Much Love,

L

P.S. Don't forget you have until midnight tonight (EST) to enter the Birthday Giveaway. 

To Those of You Who Are Waiting.

Several years ago, I went to a store and hanging desperately onto what the Lord was telling me, I bought a journal.

I walked home and sat at the desk in my dorm room and pulled it out. Opening the pages I began to write. I began to actively believe that the Lord knew what He was doing and that I was choosing to trust Him, with tears of surrender I began to believe that He was able to do so much more than I could dream. Let me tell you friend, He delivered on that promise.

I started a journal full of letters to my future husband.

I chose to let go that day and push away those feelings of doubt, 

those feelings of its never going to happen to me, 

no one could ever love me enough to marry me. 

There aren't any godly guys around me here in this place, Lord.

I chose to ignore the advice of media saying go after the guy you like, go and tell him you like him and initiate. 

I knew there had to be a better way than that.

A friend had once shared with me that she had surrendered the pen of her love life to the Lord, to do with it what He saw fit. 

And I had believed that I had done the same. 

But I realised that in not trusting Him to follow through, I was not actively believing Him. I doubted that the Lord knew my heart and who I would want for a husband someday. 

So buying a journal and believing I would one day give it to the man He had for me, I knew I was trusting Him. 

I was surrendering my love life to God through this process.

That journal became so precious. Whenever I wanted to pray for my future husband or felt discontent with him not being in my life yet, I wrote. 

I filled the pages with dreams and prayers, writing on birthdays and other days I wanted to share with him. 

Sharing those intimate details that I longed to share as I watched other couples being intimate with each other. 

Sometimes I had a lot to say and other times months would go by before I would open its pages.

Over time the Lord did bring a man into my life, and those letters started having him in mind as I wrote them. While being cautious with our conversations getting ahead of where we were at in our relationship, whenever I wanted to pray or share my dreams on where our relationship was heading, I wrote in that book.

I continued to trust the Lord to write the story He had started in His way....refusing to jump ahead now that this man was in my life.

 I filled it completely just before we got married.

On our wedding night, I handed my husband the journal and told him it was his.

All those prayers and dreams were for him. 

I gave him my whole heart when I handed him that journal. 

All the details and memories about myself I couldn't put into words to share on that night. And he read through them all in the days that followed.

I won’t share the intimate details hidden within the pages of that journal, because those letters were for His eyes only. Filled with promises I felt the Lord had for me, for us as a couple and dreams of things in the future.

I share these things to encourage you single ladies!!! To share with you how the Lord wrote that beautiful story in my life and blessed me through it. 

How those of us who wait don’t just end up all alone with no one while others get married. I want to encourage you girls, because I have been where you are. 

I have known the loneliness and the feelings of discontentment. 

I share this to share how God revealed to me how I could trust Him through those times.

The Lord protected me from revealing too much of myself to guys by nudging me to write to my future husband instead, He allowed me to record those memories within its pages to share with my husband someday. 

My husband still reads those letters to this day.

And friend, I want to encourage you to do the same.

A sweet bible study leader in high school sat a group of us down one evening and shared with us how she journalled her walk with the Lord. As she spoke of being able to look back in hard times and see how the Lord answered prayers, she revealed how often we don’t notice how prayers are answered, we forget about what we prayed and how He spoke. But when we take the time to record our prayers in a journal, we can reread things we prayed for and know how the Lord heard us! It is so encouraging in those moments when we don’t even feel we have faith the size of a mustard seed. She blessed each one of us in that group that evening and gave us each a journal in which to record our prayers and journeys with the Lord. To encourage us and to give us proof of His faithfulness in those moments of trial.

Today, I want to bless you guys in the same way.

I partnered with friends over at Paper Coterie in this last week and they want to give each of you a free journal. 

I would love for each of you to receive a journal of choice from their beautiful collection and start your own journal.

Maybe it will be full of letters to your future husband as you wait for Him.

Or even a journal recording a difficult year of your life.

Maybe even just a journal to record the mundane events you feel are taking place.

But I pray that through this journaling process, you will see God clearly. 

You will see how He does answer when we think He hasn't heard us. 

That you will be able to look back in hard times and know how He carried you through that dark valley. May you cling to His promises and not forget.  

Today I am thankful//for journaling.

Much Love,

L

Why not head over now using the link below and enter the following code at checkout :

welcomejournal

DISCLOSURE: COMPENSATED AFFILIATE LINKS USED

Purity & Waiting.

It feels strange to write about a topic which has been so dear to my heart for such a long time and know that it may not be heard well. In my single days, or even my dating days....it was easier to encourage people in this situation. But I have found as the Lord has brought a beautiful relationship into my life which turned into a marriage, that my words on the topic of singleness and dating are not heard as well.

I have often heard it is hard to be encouraged, while in your single years, by someone who has what you want...a relationship.
I even felt this way myself while waiting for the Lord to bring a man into my life.
I'm beginning to think that my unwillingness to listen to encouragement from those who had already walked down the relationship path, I may have missed out on hearing how God provided and answered the similar prayers of another sister.

That should not be discouraging. It should instead be a beautiful picture of how God answers those prayers we are praying. As I've grown older I've learnt to value having someone further ahead of you on the path in life to encourage you and seen how it's also biblical.

'Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.'

{Hebrews 11:24-25}

There is something encouraging about hearing God answer a prayer that you yourself are praying. To see victory over a challenging trial as it gives us great hope. (or at least it should, instead of just bring up envy)

I know from experience that it can be discouraging waiting to meet that someone in your life, being desperate to love them already and not understanding why he isn't here yet. I long to encourage you girls in this situation. To show you that God really does answer those prayers for a godly husband. That He hears you, loves you and definitely hasn't forgotten you. 

Did you know that you can be loving your future husband now, even before you meet him.

In fact that's what the picture of the Proverbs 31 woman shows us.....

'Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?

    She is more precious than rubies.

Her husband can trust her,

    and she will greatly enrich his life.

She brings him good, not harm,

    all the days of her life.'

{Proverbs 31:10-12}

Let me introduce you to a guy who has spent his single years living for himself. He has embraced the messages of the modern culture today and decided to 'seize the day' or 'live for the here and now.' He goes out with a different girl several times a week, just having fun. He may not sleep with any of them, he is trying to follow the Lord after all. But he figures in order to find the right girl, he needs to date around right? He doesn't spend much time investing in his family, in fact he spent most of his teenage years at home wishing he could be out with his friends during family dinners. His room is a mess and he is disrespectful of his parents. He lived for trips out to the movies with his friends and spending time with maybe even a girlfriend. When he hangs out with his friends, he shows-off wanting to be seen as cool by everyone. He loves being the center of attention, burps loudly and laughs at crude jokes being told around him. He's quite even possibly all-around a nice guy on the service, he says all the right things and knows how to be a romantic guy.

Now picture a different guy. He has also decided to make the most of every opportunity, but in order to love his future wife. Instead of not giving her much thought while growing up, he wrote her several letters and regularly prayed for her. He purposefully has chosen not to date until the Lord shows him a girl he should pursue. He works on the relationships which are already in his life. He shows his parents respect, encourages his younger brothers and sisters and genuinely loves his family. He speaks words of encouragement to his friends, seeking ways to build them up in their love for the Lord. He may be hopeless at keeping his room neat at home, but he tries out of respect for those who come into his living area. 

Which one would you feel most treasured/loved by if you were the girl brought into their life? 

Now imagine that these are not in fact guys, but girls. Just like you and me.
How wonderful would it be to aim to love our future husbands in that way?

I would love to say that I spent most of my single years pursuing the model of the second guy. In some ways I did, of course I couldn't achieve perfection in this area of life.

And that's ok. There is grace. 

(We are not saved through the things we do. The bible makes it perfectly clear we are saved by Christ dying on the cross in our place alone. Works do not play a part in our salvation. Purity does not equal salvation. Just to clarify.)

When we love Jesus and chose to follow him. We are called to live our lives for him, a life marked by love.

'A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.'

{John 13:34-35}

We are called to love our future husband all our days in Proverbs. I'm pretty sure the author was being literal. Before we are married we can show we love them by how we chose to live (and love God through these decisions to love others and put them before ourselves). 

We can find a great definition for love in 1 Corinthians.

 'Love is patient, 

love is kind. 

It does not envy, 

it does not boast, 

it is not proud. 

It does not dishonor others, 

it is not self-seeking, 

it is not easily angered, 

it keeps no record of wrongs. 

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 

It always protects, 

always trusts, 

always hopes, 

always perseveres.

Love never fails.' 

{1 Corinthians 13:4-8}

This is quite the challenging list and should be where we go for a measuring stick on how to love others in the relationships in our lives. Boy, isn't this challenging and hard?!

Choosing to prepare yourself for your future husband, while you are still single, is an amazing way to love them before you've even met them.

The purpose of saving ourselves for marriage should be out of love for our future spouses, not to earn favor with God. 

When you meet someone who has chosen to wait for you, they have saved themselves physically, emotionally, spiritually just for you. You really feel loved.

I know this from personal experience. 

But choosing to wait is not something we should do to get it given back in return. It is done out of love for the other person. It is choosing to put them first in our lives, regardless of what they choose to do for us. A great preparation for marriage. 

No matter where your life is at, or what your past looks like, you can choose to live out of love for your future husband from this day forward. 

There is no such thing as perfection while we are still human. 

Even people who set out trying to live this way selflessly from the age of thirteen still mess up. 

So even if you have already dated many people, or even if you have slept with someone....you are not damaged goods. You can choose to live out of love from them from this point onward. 

None of us has a perfect past and we all mess up.

God is a loving God of second chances.

If you have made a choice to wait for your future husband, know that from someone who has been there, it is worth waiting for. 

I promise.

I don't know of anyone who has waited, guarded their heart for their husband and regretted it. 

So keep at girl! The Lord does answer those prayers! I am totally here cheering you on and telling you to keep running this race (Heb 12:1-2). 

I leave you with a beautiful song that encouraged me so much during those years of waiting.

Much Love,

L

{On My Heart} Mondays. [When God says No]

The phone rings and I answer it, to hear a dear friend's voice saying, 

'Are you busy? Can we talk?' 

I know this means she needs to talk about something. As she shares what's plaguing her heart to me, I cry with her when needed and share her pain. 

The door has closed on a situation she so desperately wanted to walk through. That boy didn't return her feelings, she struggles with feeling she will never be with someone. Dreams and prayers are answered. But not in the way we expected. 

When God says No....it can be extremely painful.

We don't understand everything He does. His knowledge is infinitely greater than ours, after all He created us. Not the other way around.

“The temple I am going to build will be great, 

because our God is greater than all other gods.

But who is able to build a temple for him, since the heavens, 

even the highest heavens, cannot contain him? 

Who then am I to build a temple for him, 

except as a place to burn sacrifices before him?

{2 Chronicles 2:5-6}

He knows all things about us, He knew us before we were even born (Psalm 137). 

There are things in our lives we all want. Whether it is a relationship with a guy, a specific career, a  calling to go and serve in Africa, a baby.....I'm sure you know what your dreams and desires are. We are reminded in scripture that if we delight ourselves in Him, love Him with all our being....our desires line up with His will for us. We long to see things which He longs to bring about here on earth. 

‎"Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. 

Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. 

Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: 

He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, 

the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. 

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him…" (Psalm 37:5-7a, NIV)

So what happens when God answers our prayers of desperation with a 'Not right now, Child' or a solid 'No.' This is extremely hard for us, we don't see the whole picture as He does. He knows our desires and what we long to see fulfilled in our life. He knows what is not His best for us, even if we think it looks good. Sometimes that guy turns out to be not as wonderful as he first seemed. But it is usually in hindsight that we are able to see this. At the time, we don't understand, we are crushed and we sometimes feel ourselves pulling away from the Lord because we didn't like His answer.

Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror;

 then we shall see face to face. 

Now I know in part; 

then I shall know fully, 

even as I am fully known.

 {1 Cor 13:12}

So how should be act during these trying times, when 'No' or 'Not now' is what we are hearing from the Lord.

We need to remember truth, even though we might be feeling pretty crummy. But the truth is that the Lord is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow (Hebrews 13:8) just because He has said 'No,' does not mean He is not still good. He is good whether our situation is one of joy-filled delight or one of absolute sorrow. We don't understand everything going on in our lives, and we won't. He asks us to trust Him regardless of our circumstances.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart
   and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
   and he will make your paths straight.

{Proverbs 3:5-6}

I came across an excerpt written by Charles Swindoll about David's character and how he responded when the Lord answered him with a 'no'. We read in 1 Chronicles 28 about how he desired to build a temple to the Lord. A dream which he longed to see completed in his lifetime. The verse above in 2 Chronicles 2 is part of the chapter where the temple is built. However David was not the one who saw it into completion, but his son Solomon. How did David respond to this? This was his dream right!! But read that again....it was his dream, not the Lord's. 

Praise God when our dreams do line up with the Lord's. When we are seeking after Him & following Him, praise Him that we do see those dreams and desires become a reality. But we are sinful people, our dreams and desires are not always in line with God's plans. Even those which at first glance seem really good and godly. 

Because even though we want good things, we don't have the knowledge He does about the whole situation.

His ways are perfect, not ours.    

At the end of his life, David chose to focus on all that God had allowed him to do in his lifetime. 

David praised the LORD in the presence of the whole assembly, saying,

   “Praise be to you, LORD,
   the God of our father Israel,
   from everlasting to everlasting.
Yours, LORD, is the greatness and the power
   and the glory and the majesty and the splendor,
   for everything in heaven and earth is yours.
Yours, LORD, is the kingdom;
   you are exalted as head over all.
Wealth and honor come from you;
   you are the ruler of all things.
In your hands are strength and power
   to exalt and give strength to all.
Now, our God, we give you thanks,
   and praise your glorious name.

 “But who am I, and who are my people, that we should be able to give as generously as this? 

Everything comes from you, and we have given you only what comes from your hand.

{2 Chronicles 29:10-14}

Here is a man who was not bitter toward the Lord for not seeing a dream fulfilled. He chose instead to focus on how gracious the Lord was to him. He understood the Lord's character in ways I can hope I will someday. Here was a man known for being after the Lord's heart who still heard a 'No' from God.

He realised that it was not the Lord's plan for him, but for his son. He is not jealous or bitter. He is full of praise and admiration for the Lord's goodness.

So in those moments, we need to chose to remember His sweet truth.

To remember that He loves us. He knows what is best for us, not ourselves.

As it says below in Isaiah, when we wait patiently on the Lord 

we shall renew our strength. 

We will wake up and feel content soon. These feelings of desperation of dreams shattered will fade, when we look to Jesus. 

He is the same always.

 But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength;

 they shall mount up with wings as eagles; 

they shall run, and not be weary;  

and they shall walk, and not faint.

{Isaiah 40:31)

   

Every good and perfect gift is from above, 

coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, 

who does not change like shifting shadows.

{James 1:17} 

We can totally trust Him with those dreams.

Let us remind each other of this truth in those moments of sorrow.

No matter how He answers, It will be 

Good.

Much Love,

L 

{P.S. For those of you that know me personally, the pictures in this post are no way related to the girl mentioned in the post}