Different paths, same purpose.

I've had a blast reminiscing over our early years lately. The challenges which we faced, the communication mistakes & the joy over holding hands for the first time. I believe it was actually right after Andrew picked me up from the airport when I flew across the world to come visit him. He was driving us back to meet his family and held my hand at the same time. Definitely strange and unfamiliar at the time, but it still gave me butterflies. 
Relationships are just beautiful at every stage. While I look back on those days with fondness, I certainly wouldn't trade where we are now in order to relive those days.


Even though a hug or an accidental brush of the hand would leave me with tingles & sometimes short of breath back then, I can honestly say there is beauty in the now. In the familiar, in the coming home to each other, the waking up next to each other & falling asleep reading together. That never gets old and certainly wasn't something we did before we got married. 


I am sure people thought we were insane for getting married as young as we were. There were mentions of why we didn't wait to establish careers or live our lives a little before settling down. Even though I didn't think we were that young, since we did wait until after we both graduated college and I have definitely watched others get married before we did. Looking back now, I totally see that we were young, we definitely could have made better decisions and have grown immensely through making plenty of mistakes and learning to dispense grace to each other daily (sometimes several times a day). 


But everyone's stories are different, that's the beauty of being created by God for a specific purpose. We will all walk a different path, marry at different stages, walk through trials and difficulties sometimes never understanding why they were necessary. Some of us walk the path of marrying young and learning how to grow together as we make huge mistakes and experience pain, others are called to other paths. But each and every path can be used to bring glory to Him. 


I'm so thankful for where He has me, even though it is definitely not perfect and often looks very different than I thought it would. I am thankful that my heavenly father loves me enough to not leave me just comfortable, but instead longs to see me grow in my likeness of Him and ability to understand grace. Thankful for all that we have experienced, the good and the bad. Thankful for all that lies ahead. 


What's been on your heart lately? Linkup and share :) 

<div align="center">
<a href="http://www.lovelisaelle.com" title="Love Lisa Elle"><img src="http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a273/LisaBarker/IMG_5481sharetoencouragebutton_zpse8a6b58d.jpg" alt="Love Lisa Elle" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

//I DO//

For previous installments, check out the Love Story Tab in the Left Sidebar! 

I did consider leaving our story there, but I guess in order to finish telling it I should share the actual wedding day. I don't like the emphasis on wedding days at times, I really do think they are totally serious things (they are a covenant after all!) and shouldn't be entered into lightly, but they are not everything you are working towards as a couple. 
I feel that is such a huge emphasis in our culture nowadays. 
Having the perfect wedding.


I'm not sure I would say it was the perfect wedding, but it was a day to remember and certainly perfect for us. The run up to the event was stressful, with friends to pick up from the airport (I think 50% of our guests were from out of town) so they needed to get to the places they were staying. We wanted to visit with everyone as some friends I hadn't seen since high school! Plus all the last minute wedding details to take care of. 


But the day finally arrived. 

The day before our wedding, A came into town. He had projects to finish at school so yes he didn't get there until 24 hrs before our ceremony. I don't think the best man was too impressed with this arrangement!!! lol!!! I found the rehearsal nerve-racking, in the midst of all the planning I hadn't had time to give much thought to the fact that I had to walk down as aisle full of people watching me. Without tripping or doing anything wrong. (Thank goodness I chose not to wear heels!) So I was freaking out a little at the rehearsal.

Then on our wedding day, I was so chilled out, it must have totally been God's peace. Everyone else was running around like crazy, all the bridesmaids getting dressed and I was just chilling in the dressing room dressed and ready. Then I just walked down the aisle towards my best friend. I will admit, I just looked at him the whole time, that's how I managed that walk! Same for later in the day when the power went out in the church, A and I were like oh that's ok...we'll figure it out. Same for the reception when asked how we wanted to do things, like what order....we just went with the flow. 

I had a list of God's blessings which took place during the wedding, I wanted to share them with you friends:

-We did save our first kiss, and despite A having to ask me not to giggle so he could actually kiss me, I guess it went ok. (You can read more on that here) 

- We received an abundance of gifts, and we didn't even have a place to live yet or put them all! We were blown away by everyone's generosity. 

- A huge storm passed through during the ceremony, and all I could think about with the loud thunder was how it felt like God was really present

- The power went out immediately after the ceremony & our amazing photographer just took care of everything with battery operated flashes for inside the church! We were so impressed. 

- We had chosen to have bridal party pictures outside in a cornfield, with tornado warnings happening throughout the day. Friends, that field we are staying on was completely dry! There was minimal mud on my dress to prove it. Right after we decided the pictures were probably done, we climbed back in the limo and it poured again and didn't stop during the whole reception. 

- We have incredible families and friends who love and support us so dearly, their speeches made us laugh so hard and nearly cry at times. 

- For various reasons, we ended up with no DJ and several friends graciously played our playlist, which was an incredible mix, people commented on how fun the dancing at our wedding was for several years after haha! 

- We had an amazing wedding party, so encouraging, just a blast to be with!! 

- Having so many people we know and love all in the same room, at the same time!! This will probably never happen again! 

- Seeing how God brought us through so much before we were even married gave me so much hope that He would continue to do so in the future no matter how bleak things seem! I should never doubt His ways or timing! 

This post is part of my 31 day series for the month of October, 
fighting through the fears and sharing the confusing passions I have. 
Hoping to figure out the bigger picture of all these interests. 

//A Focus While Planning//

I was never the little girl who planned her wedding, knew what kind of dress she wanted, the colors she would have, the flowers, the scenery. It was just not something I had wanted to dwell on. I dreamed of it being beautiful, but never had a set picture in my mind of what that would look like in reality.


I loved the way several books had described the wedding day, but that was about it.
So this was a little stressful.
I arrived back to a job, but nowhere to live. Then God provided, and I found myself living with 3 sweet girls from my church. 


The engagement year was really hard, realising it was my last year in England and preparing for the changes to come, like filing for a visa, planning a big move across the Atlantic, but also still trying to enjoy this engagement season and being content with where the Lord had still placed me for just a bit longer.
My sweet friends made it so much easier. 

I'm also so thankful that we still had that distance, just as protection from that physical intimacy. As much as we didn't appreciate it a lot, I know it was really God's grace. 
It also gave us the necessary time to plan a wedding when one of you is working full time and the other is in school. 

We also planned our wedding in a city that neither of us were living in. Thankfully we were able to find a venue for the ceremony & reception really soon after we were engaged. 

The rest was done in a few intense intervals, like Thanksgiving we both were able to head back to where A's family was originally from and plan our wedding and again my sister and I flew in 10 days before our wedding the following summer.
So we were able to do most things in those few days. 

The Lord really just opened doors and provided from the beautiful church we found with a fee we could afford who would let us bring in our own pastor, to the reception hall who gave us a huge discount when we opted to have no alcohol at the reception, finding bouquets for the bridesmaids at a store that was liquidizing and also finding bridesmaids dresses available in 3 different countries so that all our bridesmaids could order them! 

In so many ways I think it was good while I was single to not focus on a wedding, although I will admit that I probably frustrated people at various points with not knowing perhaps what I was looking for. 

I did try and maintain a mindset of the wedding not being as big of a deal as it is made out to be in movies. Having it absolutely perfect, because it is really a celebration of the marriage. Not about the wedding. 
I don't think its a bad thing to know what you want, but just to remember to hold onto it lightly, remembering what your real goal is with planning.
So we tried our best to make our focus the marriage, again there was a lot of grace.  
I wish pinterest had been around when we were planning though, so many cute DIY ideas you can use which look amazing and also don't blowup your budget. 

If you are planning (or just interested in looking):

Sisters & Weddings

Creative ways of working with the Weather

Dress Inspiration

Ideas for Flowers

Wedding Cake Ideas

Hairstyle Inspiration

Wedding Shoes

Grey & Red Color Ideas

Invitation Ideas

Guestbook Ideas
Photography
Bridesmaids
Kids in Weddings
Blue & Orange Color Ideas

This post is part of my 31 day series for the month of October, 
fighting through the fears and sharing the confusing passions I have. 
Hoping to figure out the bigger picture of all these interests. 

//A Sparkly Diamond//

(For Disclaimer see Here, Part 1 Click Here, Part 2 Click Here, Part 3 Click Here) 

Finally. The day arrived.

I graduated from college (not what you were expecting?) after a ridiculously difficult last year fueled by sheer desire to complete my degree. I didn't know what that summer after graduation would hold.

I graduated without a job & wasn't sure about my career at all. But I knew I would be seeing A and his family in the states again.

So after my last class & exam, I headed out on a plane to go spend time with them.

I flew out first to visit a dear friend who walked with me through all the heartache that first year of college, the waiting stages, the being pursued by this godly man! She is a gem! 

She encouraged me so much throughout and still does to this day. 

So I flew out to see her, she dreamed with me and pondered whether that summer held engagement, whether A had bought a ring. 

Then I flew back to the Midwest to his family as A was off at a leadership camp. 

We then took off on a 2,000+ mile drive to Montana, picking him up from this training camp on the way. 

It was several days of beautiful scenery as we toured Glacier National Park. And I will admit, days of wondering if he was going to propose? We were a year away from A graduating college and we had talked about what a reasonable length of time would be for engagement, so I figured he would ask while we were in such a gorgeous place! 

It's very distracting trying to soak in the beauty of the scenery wondering if the guy next to you has a diamond ring in his pocket haha! 
After a few days, I let it going figuring maybe he had other plans, maybe he wanted to talk about it when we got back to the Midwest. 


On our drive home we stopped in Yellowstone National Park, at this point it was just us and A's immediate family (we were around a lot of extended family in Glacier, it was a family reunion). 
As pretty as Glacier was, Yellowstone took my breath away! 
We drove into the park and I couldn't stop looking at the beauty of everything! It was just yeah....stunning!! After our drive to the park, we had some daylight left to make a few more stops before heading to the place we were staying that night, so we headed to a waterfall called Tower Falls. 
We couldn't actually see much from the viewing point, and there was a trail leading down to the base of the falls. So A decided we should walk down there to check it out. 

I looked at that trail and seriously thought he was crazy, after all the driving and then walking down the trail just to have to walk all the way back up? But he seemed disappointed so I agreed it would be a good idea (haha!). He was right, it was pretty down there in the valley, we couldn't actually see the entire waterfall which was hidden round a bend, but we could hear it. There was no-one else around (did I mention the long trail haha!), so we were enjoying each others company. 


Then he pulls out my camera and starts taking fun pictures with all the water around and the light from the sun (man after my heart right there lol!). Then he stops and turns to face me acting so strange. 
(He told me later he had an entire speech but was so nervous!) 


He asked me if I would be his wife.

And of course, I said yes.

Couldn't stop smiling! 

So he put a beautiful ring on my finger at 7.45pm on August 4th, 2009.


I was betrothed. 
Not longer a girlfriend but a fiancée. 


That evening we also saw the most spectacular sunset I have ever seen! 
It had nothing to do with the beautiful ring weighing down my left hand, I'm sure!

(The hilarious part us we had no cell service for the next 24-36hrs in the park, so I couldn't call my family and tell them the news haha!) 

We spent another few weeks together, during which time I received a phone call with a job offer back in England. So the plan was, I would head back and work for a year then we would be married a year later the following Summer. 

God's timing was perfect! I'm so glad he waited and asked me in Yellowstone instead.
Even if I did wonder for days haha! 

This post is part of my 31 day series for the month of October, 
fighting through the fears and sharing the confusing passions I have. 
Hoping to figure out the bigger picture of all these interests. 

//The Courtship//

Well since I have kept you waiting long enough friends, here is the next part.
(For Disclaimer see Here, Part 1 Click Here, Part 2 Click Here) 
I highly recommend reading the previous parts first! 


What a journey. 


I felt like Abraham arriving at this moment asked to surrender his son. About to kill his dream completely, surrendering His will & trusting the Lord completely. Only to find the Lord was just testing me.
Just purifying my love for Him above any other relationship in my life.
Making sure this guy was no longer an idol. 


I received that email about A prayerfully considering starting a relationship with me & started praying about what I should do. 
I was now able to see clearly and wanted to make sure this was a guy I wanted pursuing me. Did I really think he was someone I could marry someday?
After much time with the Lord (it was probably several weeks or months of surface level talking through emails and occasional Skype call) I felt the light was green.


So I proceeded with caution.


I say that because there was still a significant amount of time before marriage was a possibility. So we both felt it was important to do this wisely, with a time frame in mind rather than heading full-on towards marriage within in a short period of time (which is totally appropriate in some situations). 
So we carefully started to get to know each other again as friends first. 
Because I lot had happened in those transitions, a lot of growth and we wanted to know if we still thought of each other as highly as we had. 

We restricted our conversations for quite some time, several topics were off limits completely. There was no talking about the future initially (for instance no dreaming together about what our babies would look like, what our wedding should be like). 
Even though we were trying to figure out if marriage was for us, A did a great job of guarding our conversations to keep my heart from completely going full force ahead and planning our wedding in those initial days lol! 
We also didn't talk every day to slow that emotional intimacy. 


Don't hear me say we were perfect, because that is far from the truth. 
There are still things I would have done differently looking back. But we were at least trying to be wise, trying to decipher if the Lord was leading us to marriage but also not hinder where for the time being He had placed us, me in England and A here in the Midwest. 
(For instance, it may have been helpful for us not to have talked late at night, when we were tired it was easier to let our guard down about the emotional intimacy. However we did have a 5hr time change to consider and with both of us in school, it was sometimes impossible to avoid. But it would have been helpful to have known this weakness. So perhaps in hindsight, if I were considering courting/dating I would instead avoid those late night conversations entirely.)


But there is grace. 


After about 7 months of getting to know each other again, we finally decided it was time to spent time together in person. A invited me to spend New Years with his family back in the place we had originally met and grown up together. 
It was familiar, but new all at the same time. 
It was a sweet time of getting to know A's family more. 


Following that there was another trip to the States the summer that followed and then Christmas with my family the following year. 


It was a slow process. Sometimes I wish it could have been faster as I found myself falling in love with this man, but it was still restricted by distance and college.
Which allowed us to trust the Lord for His timing and not ours. 

(Please let me know if I am leaving things out you would like to know more about friends! Either comment below or email me: allgloriouswithinblog@gmail.com)

P.S. Disclaimer - I used the word courtship in the title because I felt that it had more meaning about the purpose behind the relationship. I am by no means apposed to 'dating' I feel those two words are just words. I just wanted to make it clear there was a purpose to the dating. Plus it sounds like something from Jane Austin haha! 

This post is part of my 31 day series for the month of October, 
fighting through the fears and sharing the confusing passions I have. 
Hoping to figure out the bigger picture of all these interests. 

//Surrender & Falling in Love//

So with all the build up to finishing the story, here we go. Part 1 of our story is here. 

(So head over and read that first if you haven't yet.) 

So you read correctly, we said goodbye to each other.

And by no contact, that's exactly what I mean. And it wasn't just to obey A's parents, if we have wanted to continue talking we could have. No-one regulated our Skype accounts or emails or MSN (remember the msn days!). 

But we both agreed that it was a good idea, even though hard. 

An act of surrender. 

My freshman year of college was possibly the hardest year of my life to date. A was my best friend when I left the Middle East and suddenly found myself in Oxford, England. The city of dreaming spires, of education & C.S. Lewis. 

A place I would eventually learn to love.

But that first year, I felt as though the Lord had dragged me there kicking and screaming against my will. 

It's funny because most people here in the states absolutely love the idea of going to Europe... its a dream to go, maybe even specifically to England. 

But for me, it was an adventure I didn't want. 

Here was the third culture kid part of me coming out. 

It was my 'home' country, but nothing about it felt like home. 

I think the hard part about being born British was that when I went to college, everyone expected me to be a certain way, to act a certain way. But I grew up in a very american environment. I didn't understand the British humor and jokes that people would tell. I couldn't participate in conversations about TV shows from childhood. 

After all, I rode to school on a camel (not really, but that's a common question and assumption I got haha!). 

This was a year of letting go for me.

Of truly understanding how to lean on the Lord 100%, to trust His timing for romance and provision of a spouse someday if He saw fit. I had to learn how to lean on Him, because I didn't have anything else. My best friend was out of the picture, my family in another city and all my other friends scattered across the globe.  (The Lord would bring some incredible friends into my life over the next few years!) 

The more I struggled to make friends and fit in while in England, battling with the culture, the more I leaned on the Lord. 

And I fell in love with Jesus. 

While this year was the hardest, I also look back on this season with so much envy. 

I miss how utterly dependent on Him I had to be to make it through each day. 

How my breaking heart had to seek Him to keep the pieces together.

How I remember being held in His arms at night as I cried myself to sleep countless nights in a row. 

I missed A, my friends & I struggled to trust Him daily. 

And slowly, very slowly....He became enough. 

I started out that year wanting to marry A right away after graduation. I was terrified he was going to meet another godly girl at college, someone better suited for him. A girl who loved the Lord more than I did, who would serve the Lord by His side in a way I couldn't dream of. 

Towards the end of the year, my heart was found in Jesus, no longer wrapped up in my desire to be with A.

I was already in love.

Like a girl who had surrendered her most treasured possession back to her father never knowing if she would see it again.

Then I got an email.

From a familiar guy, who was prayerfully considering along with his parents, the possibility of pursuing me with the intention of figuring out if we should get married. 

(I'll be back with more tomorrow)

This post is part of my 31 day series for the month of October, 
fighting through the fears and sharing the confusing passions I have. 
Hoping to figure out the bigger picture of all these interests. 

The in-between time & Discovering a Passion.

If you missed our girly night last night friends!! You can read it below, I started sharing our love story. 

Today I am over on Moriah's lovely blog sharing a little of what happened during the summer after we parted. 

(Totally had not planned it like this, the Lord is still writing this for me. The post for Moriah was written a few weeks ago haha! I didn't remember it was up today until I saw her tweet this morning!)

So head over there to read it :)

Much Love! 

L

The post which was on Moriah's Blog:
(I updated with pictures)

I recall sitting on a bus travelling across India the summer after I graduated high school, some seven nine year ago now (how’s that for crazy!). We had just completed the short-term project we were on working and were heading back home to the Middle East. While on the trip I had developed some friendships with several girls who didn’t live in the same city as I did, and we weren’t sure when we would see each other again. One of them asked me if I was going on the second trip leaving for Africa a week later.

I replied with a no and they soon asked me why I wasn’t going. I informed them I didn’t have the money that was needed to go on yet another mission trip. I hadn’t done any fund raising, and really I hadn’t thought about another trip. I was just super excited to have gone on the first. They asked me what I planned on doing instead. And really, the answer was nothing. I had the whole summer ahead of me before college started the other side of the world. But I didn’t have any set plans. So they challenged me about coming with them. 

I remember feeling frustrated that I hadn’t thought about it before. That something like money would stop me from going to Africa for the first time because I hadn’t planned. And I felt that nudge. I felt the Lord challenge me about whether I thought He could provide. 

I secretly felt it was hopeless, there was only six days between landing and leaving for Africa. 

But I chose to trust. Thinking I had nothing to lose. 

After returning home, through God’s provision of visas, parental support and financial support being provided within 24 hrs of returning home from India, I found myself on another plane a few short days later.

Once arriving in the bush of a small village in northern Tanzania, I fell in love. It really is so true that Africa just gets under your skin. A place full of people who passionately love God and others who desperately need to hear about Him.

A place where I hope someday to return, to adopt and maybe even use my passion for photography. 

I’m not yet sure how all of these passions are linked to one another. I only know that the Lord continues to work them further into the depths of my soul. His provision on my high school trip really proved to me that sometimes when God has something for you, the doors will open like you’ve never seen.

For now, I am working on furthering my photography skills, working on involvement with The Mocha Club and networking with so many incredible women with a heart for Africa and adoption. As for what happens next, only God knows J

I really think that in order to find your passion, you need to walk with eyes open. Find what inspires you, encourages you to seek the Lord and listen to those small nudges. And be ready to let go of things when He asks us to.

He will show you where He wants you.

At least that’s my prayer.

"I waited patiently for the Lord;

he turned to me and heard my cry.

2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,

out of the mud and mire;

he set my feet on a rock

and gave me a firm place to stand.

3 He put a new song in my mouth,

a hymn of praise to our God.

Many will see and fear the Lord

and put their trust in him." Psalm 40:1-3

A Love Story. Maybe its Ours. Part 1.

I don't know about you guys, but I really feel like I should be having  more girly evenings. Just this desire to sit down with girly magazines, do eat others hair, watch a girly movie or even just hang out and talk. Perhaps its because I've done a bunch of hanging with the hubby and some of his friends lately. Or maybe just that I'm more of a girly girl than I thought I was haha. Or just that I'm in desperate need of a manicure ;)

I'm not sure if this should become a weekly thing too. A girly night here in this little space. Wouldn't it be awesome if the comments section became like a chatting place. Sorry dreaming moment there.

As you can probably tell I get these random dreaming moments or moments of inspiration as I like to call them. 

Anyway, just wondering if you guys had any suggestions on topics for girly evenings? Things you want to talk about together? And I say that cause I would love to talk with you guys and not at you guys too :) 

I felt the desire to share our love story for the first time this evening. And if you were here, I would probably pull out the scrapbooks ;)

Not sure how far I'll get but I will go ahead and start. I've been meaning to share for a while how God scripted our story and just haven't got to it. 

So if you're at a point in life where this won't be encouraging, feel free to stop reading here.

I don't want to discourage anyone, I just want to share how the Lord brought us together to praise His goodness in that and to encourage those of you who are waiting, that God does hear us when we pray and write beautiful love stories.

(I will add that obviously this is all from my point of view, 

for A's version....well I guess you'd have to ask him.....)

So here's possibly why I put this off haha! Because in my opinion, the story starts here.

In the awkward pre-teen new girl stage. I had just moved from another country where I had been really comfortable. I had been in a school I loved and had a group of friends who I was close to, then we moved. And not like one of your few hours away kind of moves, but more like a different part of the world, new continent type of move. So there was no possible chance I was going to see these friends on a regular basis, if ever again. Time took my group of friends to literally the four corners of the globe, so you get the idea haha. 

So I had just moved to this new place and the new church we started going to had an Awana club, including a Jr high group. So my sister and I started going and there we met some pretty cool people. Many of whom we would grow up with of the next few years.

One of which was this guy:

(Totally asked his permission before posting btw)

And yeah, well I will confess that even at thirteen. I liked him. He seemed like a nice guy, not that we were going to date or anything like that. But lets just say I totally had a crush on him back then. 

So if you skip several awkward years of being friends, me having a bit of a crush on him. But never knowing each other that well as he was homeschooled and I went to school, we only saw each other at Awana. Then we also went to youth group together, having several of the same friends. It wasn't as though there were many kids our age. 

So my last year of high school and the year after (I took a gap year after high school), we hung out with our friends and started to get to know each other well.

Mutually liking what we saw in the other person.

I had begun praying about what I wanted in a husband someday when I was sixteen. I also began reading several books like I kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris, When God Writes Your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy, but didn't really have any idea at this point what to do with dating. A's parents had thought a lot about those things beforehand and really advocated no dating in high school. And looking back I am so glad they shared their wisdom with us. 

(I would highly recommend those books, even if you don't agree with everything...they are worth reading and make you think! I would also advocate while in high school figuring out what your thoughts on about dating before you meet a guy you like!)     

I knew A when I wrote what I was looking for in a husband, but we weren't super close. In fact I had several other crushes in between meeting him and really liking him by the end of high school :)

So by the end of high school I pulled that list back out and his character was a lot like what I had been praying for, not 100% perfect though. 

After all we were still incredibly young and both planned on going to college.....in different countries. 

But by this point, we liked what we saw in each other and weren't sure what to do about it.

It was suggested to us, that because we were getting so close with no intention of being able to be engaged or marry anytime soon, that we stop talking on leaving for college in different countries. Instead just trusting that if the Lord wanted the two of us together, He would make that clear. So that we wouldn't continue to make something work that was never intended for where we were at in life. 

And I am SO glad we did. 

So summer before college, I said goodbye to my best friend, maybe for good.

Praying and trusting that God knew what He was doing, even if we didn't have a clue.

A few hours after the picture was taken, he got on a plane heading to the states to go to college.

I stayed home for the summer with multiple adventures (stories for another time) then headed to England in the fall for college.

But I might stop there for this evening friends!